There's a joke that makes the rounds which recent experiences have brought to life. First, the joke:
An American, a Chinese, a Russian and an Israeli are all loitering on the street corner when a reporter comes up to them and asks, "Excuse me, what is your opinion about the meat shortage?"
First, the Russian asks, "What's an opinion?"
Then the Chinese inquires, "What's meat?"
The American follows up with, "What's a shortage?"
Then the Israeli queries, "What's 'excuse me'?"
Now, we have found that the "What's 'excuse me'" is an untrue stereotype. Israelis are actually quite warm, and not lacking in courtesy and care (though social mores are sometimes different from the U.S., in both directions).
However, we never fully understood the American part, "What's a shortage?", until we got to Israel. Lesson number one was the Fiber One shortage. Now, to the best of our knowledge, there is a Fiber One plant in Israel. But one fine day several months ago, no Fiber One on the supermarket shelves. Anywhere. Michael asked the manager of one of the big stores, and he said "There's a shortage from the factory. There is no Fiber One in Israel until the shortage ends."
We scratched our heads (was the Fiber One factory under siege? On strike?) and gloomily substituted Frosted Flakes (or Frosties, as they call them in England and Israel) for our healthful Fiber One until the five week shortage finally broke.
Then, of course, was the Bran Flakes shortage. You must understand that Israelis love Bran Flakes. There are something like twenty different varieties. But one day, this Israeli staple had disappeared until-- the (choose one) strike/siege/extended factory vacation ended.
More recently (and still ongoing, though there are rumors of an end) has been the great brown sugar shortage of 5773-5774 (or 2013). One day I sent Michael to the store with brown sugar on the list, and he came back with "golden sugar," subtitled "brown sugar with a fine taste." Let me tell you that golden sugar is brown sugar only if you define brown as "not white." No offense to golden sugar, but the color is not brown. The texture is not the same. It doesn't taste the same.
The other day, Michael discovered that the brown sugar shortage has been going on for about a month, and appears to be nation-wide. I wonder whether this one is not an Israeli thing, but is connected to the giant molasses spill near Hawaii a month ago. Oy.
In other news, almost overnight the weather here has changed. Now mornings are cool and evenings are (according to Michael the perfect temperature) a bit chilly. Air conditionings have been switched off but I think the hot water heater may need to be turned on soon. The hot water heater is solar powered. It actually feels like fall but without the pretty colored leaves that we used to see. Granted those leaves would end up on your lawn and it was the work of Sisyphus trying to keep the lawn clear.
Meanwhile, I previously mentioned that my "observation period" in the ED had been delayed. I should clarify a bit. There is something of a physician shortage here and one of the initiatives underwork is that North American doctors are sort of "fast tracked" to start working. I won't rehash the difficulties I personally faced having to obtain my license from the North American state of Kansas (apparently not as well recognized as Dorothy and Toto would like to think!) but now in order to get my "specialty recognition" I need to be observed for 3 months in the ED. Three months is considered the minimum amount of time required and is generally granted to those who are board certified in their field in North America. It's not a lot of time especially considering that in the reverse, physicians moving to the U.S. generally have to do their entire training over. However, the observation period does have to be consecutive and I just learned last week that I have to give proof of my childhood immunizations. If I'm out in left field, someone please let me know, but I don't have my immunization records. Granted, I was born in a time when parents remembered what the different diseases looked like and were afraid and wanted to protect their children and so we all got vaccinated. But the proving of it is going to entail several stops at different health clinics in different cities in Israel. I must: 1) Get my blood drawn for antibodies to prove that I did receive certain shots 2) For the shots that can't be proven via lab go to the ministry of health and get boosters. Not sure if you would call 15 months the "fast track" but here I am. So I'm not taking it on the chin, I'm taking it in the upper arm--a few times!
While we're on the subject of vaccinations, there was polio found in a water source in Israel and so it was recommended that all children under age 10 receive the live vaccine. (The age cutoff is calculated based on the time period that live vaccine was stopped and assumptions about hand washing---polio being spread via the oral-fecal route). The majority of parents seem to have complied but there are quite a few that can't decide. I am not sure when the anti-vaccination campaign got so strong but it's just so ironic to me that the parents who are so against it would have been the same group to receive the live vaccine when they were kids because that's what they were using both in Israel and the U.S. until the early 2000's.
Anyway, since I'm mostly spending my time driving around getting needles in the arm, I decided I should take another ulpan (Hebrew course). So, I contacted my local ulpan (joy= we live in a city with an ulpan!) showed up today as instructed and was promptly told they had no space for me (oy= the ulpan is full). Sort of ironic because the woman at the hospital who put the final touches on my paperwork (that will now take 6 weeks to process) repeatedly told me that I needed to work on my Hebrew. Well geez people, I'm trying. She was actually quite opinionated on the subject---maybe I could get her to call the head of the ulpan here and pull a few strings. So now the coordinator of my ulpan last year is sending proof to this ulpan that I actually didn't receive all the hours I am entitled to as an immigrant and this apparently will create a space for me in the class.
And on the home front, classes have started in our own little ulpan. Apparently, convinced that Michael and I have been derelect in our duties to teach Ariella English, Lital has started a homeschool of sorts. It sort of reminds me of Sarah and Scott G. back in the day. She has set up a homeroom in Michael's office, complete with workbooks, worksheets and a curriculum (my favorites being "Computer Tusday"--hopefully that's not just them watching funny youtube videos and "Sport Wensday"---hey it's important to know how to say "not fair it was my turn" in English). To make the special school truly authentic, Lital even gave herself a day off each week, as Israeli teachers work five days a week, even though the children are in school for six. (Figure out those schoolhouse logistics!)
Let me end by re-visiting my upcoming vaccination schedule. If you have plans to be at the Department of Health in Ramla on the third Wednesday of the month between 7:15 and 7:40, I will see you there!
Monday, October 7, 2013
Monday, September 30, 2013
The law of maximum entropy
The Sukkahs (temporary outdoor dwelling space) came down as quickly as they went up. Last week was the holiday of Sukkot--a holiday known as our time of joy-- and it is such an amazing time to be in Israel. I personally think it is one of our most fabulous holidays, especially when you get to celebrate and enjoy the entire week. The building of the Sukkahs that we dwell in for the week of the holiday go up quickly right after Yom Kippur. I was still in the US at that point this year but it was fun to come back and see all the different varieties that people construct. The balcony off our apartment is built in such a way that all we really had to do was put up our schach (covering for the Sukkah). This and hanging the decorations was pretty easy. Between all the different meals with friends, Sukkah "hopping" parties, and trips, we spent the holiday on the border of fun and too much fun. Standing on that border is a sweet spot but as an ER doc and a mom I'll let you know that if you add alcohol or your own children into that mixture then cross that border at your own risk!
The day after a holiday is still considered a day off (i.e. no school). I think this is to give everyone a day to travel back and recuperate, and because of a strong teacher's union. We used the day to go to the beach with friends who were visiting from the U.S., which we followed with lunch at nearby IKEA's very impressive cafeteria. The Mediterranean is always beautiful, and the waves were great. There were, surprisingly, still a few jelly-fish, but they were small enough and few enough to not be a bother.
Speaking of jelly, Sukkot brought hints of Chanukah already, with sufganiyot (Israeli jelly-filled donuts, a Chanukah staple) already making their appearance at the local bakeries.
I had expected that with the wrap up of the holiday season, I would start my "observation period" in the Emergency Department. Apparently there is a bit more paperwork that I had previously been unaware of so it will likely be a few months before I actually start. That's OK-- our space needs some serious organization. I can't say that I have ever been a good homemaker, but hope springs eternal and I do like to cook. And from what little I understand of chaos theory (and it is very little) as soon as I start organizing around here, someone else's life is about to get rather crazy.
On the first of the intermediate days we took a trip to Shiloh. Shiloh is an ancient Bibilical city that was the religious center of Israel for several hundred years before Jerusalem. It was about a 50 minute drive and is quite scenic. Mostly rocky hillsides dotted with occasional herds of animals and not so occasional large red signs. The large red signs were at the entrances to Palestinian towns and inform you that the road leads to "Area A" and is forbidden for Israeli citizens and that it is not only against Israeli law to enter but also dangerous to your life. Sadly, there was an Israeli man who was murdered that week when he agreed to share a ride home with his Palestinian co-worker. His colleague did not take him home but instead kidnapped and murdered him. We work really hard to teach our children not to generalize about groups of people and I think it is an important value, but that story does give pause when it comes to considering danger to you and your family.
Anyway, Shiloh is a really interesting place to visit. Unfortunately, we were slightly late for the English tour, so we went on a Hebrew tour. At this point I guess it's really only unfortunate for me as everybody else's Hebrew is coming along nicely. You walk along the paths and they perform reenactments of different historical events and try to bring a lot of history/religion to life. The path of the tour leads up a hill where you watch a movie that is on panoramic screens and it fades in and out of the real life background that you see through the large windows/movie screens to the scenery in the background which is breathtaking. Naturally since we had tickets to the English movie which had already been shown, we had to scramble for some tickets to this one. Luckily one of the families that had gone with the group had extra tickets though when we got in there were at least 20 of us who had to stand so I'm not even certain why they had the tickets. Just comparing our family position this Sukkot to last year, it is phenomenal that my kids can listen to what they are hearing. After the movie we visited different booths where the kids did various thematic art projects, including drawing, mosaics, grinding spices, and making grape juice.
The next day we went to a small village nearby that teaches agriculture and farming. They had turned the farm into a big exhibit for kids. This is the true organic experience with real dirt and mess and not the kind brought to you by Johnson and Johnson. Though even there, they didn't allow the kids to eat the goat cheese that they made because it was in unpasteurized form. And it's Israel so you don't have pony rides, you have camel rides. I thought it would be fun to ride along with the kids. And it was, until it was time to get off. To any who would criticize my performance, all I can say is that you should try doing that in a skirt. Oy vay! I also wouldn't recommend it to anyone with a hip replacement.
We weren't sure what to do the next day, when lo and behold a neighbor told us about the annual circus in Modiin. Yes, dear readers, our amazing city has a circus every year during Chol Hamoed Sukkot. We went to an acrobat show which was an urban-funk type performance. Performers way, way fitter than anybody we know (and we know some very fit people!), scampering up and down twenty foot poles like squirrels, swinging from a trapeze upside down while holding another performer with one hand, balancing on a board on top of a rolling cylinder on top of another board, on top of a cylinder moving the other direction, on top of a small table, etc. Apparently the shows at night involve light shows and all kinds of fun but we already had plans by the time we heard about it, so it's something to look forward to next year.
After Sukkot, there is another holiday called Shemini Atzeret. The Rabbis compare this to an after party. Sort of like Sukkot was so much fun let's just spend another day together. The holiday coincides with Simchat Torah, a celebration marking the end of the annual cycle of Torah reading.
The day after a holiday is still considered a day off (i.e. no school). I think this is to give everyone a day to travel back and recuperate, and because of a strong teacher's union. We used the day to go to the beach with friends who were visiting from the U.S., which we followed with lunch at nearby IKEA's very impressive cafeteria. The Mediterranean is always beautiful, and the waves were great. There were, surprisingly, still a few jelly-fish, but they were small enough and few enough to not be a bother.
Speaking of jelly, Sukkot brought hints of Chanukah already, with sufganiyot (Israeli jelly-filled donuts, a Chanukah staple) already making their appearance at the local bakeries.
I had expected that with the wrap up of the holiday season, I would start my "observation period" in the Emergency Department. Apparently there is a bit more paperwork that I had previously been unaware of so it will likely be a few months before I actually start. That's OK-- our space needs some serious organization. I can't say that I have ever been a good homemaker, but hope springs eternal and I do like to cook. And from what little I understand of chaos theory (and it is very little) as soon as I start organizing around here, someone else's life is about to get rather crazy.
Wednesday, September 4, 2013
The Final Post of the Year (Jewish Calendar:) )
Oh, my poor abandoned blog! It has been so long. I have thought of you and I've meant to sit down and write but you know how it goes. Anyway, my parents came to visit for almost 3 weeks and it was such a wonderful trip. Whatever I had hoped it would be in terms of my father and the possibility that it could be his last time in Israel, my expectations were exceeded. For starters, on the first night he gave me a letter and a necklace. It was so meaningful, and now I have them for the rest of my life. For those who don't know my dad, you can see what a caring and thoughtful man he is. And really, since the natural order in life is for parents to die first what an amazing thing for any parent to do for their child. So, if any readers out there want to take a cue from my dad: write a letter to your child for when you are no longer around. It will mean a lot to them.
A few highlights from their trip:
While they were here my dad's energy was incredible. We took advantage of every minute. First of all, my parents brought about 20 pounds of candy to Israel. The dogs at the airport were probably going nuts thinking that there was something contraband tucked away b/c who in the world brings candy to Israel? But God bless my parents--they brought 4 suitcases worth of stuff. One of the things they brought was fresh blueberries. It had been over a year since we've had berries, so they were a big hit. I am not sure why we don't have blueberries here. I have heard you can pick them in the Golan but that would be a drive of several hours, so maybe on some future trip.
After the first Shabbat spent with good friends in Elazar we headed up North. We went rafting on the Jordan River. By "we" I mean everyone except for Ariella and me, because in the rafting company employee we found the one person in Israel who was concerned with safety and wouldn't let Ariella go in, because she was under five. We still had fun though, because well frankly, when was the last time you spent a couple of hours without any distraction hanging out with your child outdoors? I learned all about her desire to become a bird and live in the tree tops or a lion and roar at the animals in the jungle.
Our friends in Elazar recommended we go to a placed called "The Orange Grove." What a fabulous tip. I haven't seen it in guide books, but if you are visiting in Israel and have children I would try to get there. It's like winning a golden ticket. But instead of being invited to Willy Wonka's chocolate factory you are invited to his back yard. They literally built a backyard type play area in an orange grove. I mean some people have pretty cool yards. They have zip lines, and a pool and a cool jungle gym (hey Jay and Margie--how are you doing?) but nobody I know has a back yard like this. Pretty much any cool thing you could think of to run and jump and play with in a backyard was in this orange grove and it was a ton of fun.
One day we went to the Jerusalem zoo and then met cousins at the outdoor mall bordering the old city. My dad and one cousin walked to the Kotel (Western wall) and then met us at a restaurant. Some kind of artist fair was going on, and the mall was packed. Musicians were playing and it was just a very festive atmosphere. Luckily, the Italian place we like is sort of hidden away so there was no wait to get in. As we were trying to figure out exactly what the relationship would be between my kids and my mom's cousins' grandkids, their daughter said "We're English speaking relatives in Israel--that's practically like being twins." And it's true. For us anyway, as we don't really have much family here. As we were leaving the restaurant, Lital said she wanted ice cream and since it was only 10PM and we were in Jerusalem with the grandparents, she got her wish. You never have to go too far to find ice cream in Israel (unless it's 10PM and you're at Mamilla mall with your children. That particular detour will cost you at least an hour!)
One day while driving with my mom, I got distracted by Waze (oops) and popped a tire as I bumped up the curb. I pulled the car over about a block later and before we could even get out of the car, a jogger stopped and offered to change the tire. I was so confused as to why he had been out running with a jack but later my mom explained that it was from my trunk. I took a whole semester of driver's ed and frankly I feel like I should get a refund or something because I knew absolutely nothing about changing a tire. In fact, I didn't even put the car in neutral as I was apparently supposed to. The fellow who was helping joked that he should have known Americans wouldn't know to put the car in neutral. Don't be offended, I lived up to every stereotype imaginable that day. It is something I love about Israel and Modiin people are really helpful.
As is the case with most trips, we didn't do everything we wanted but we had a truly great time together. My parents left the night before school started. Now, I've previously told you about our "courtyard of dreams" (another great name from my friend Ilene). So two nights before school started they had a movie night for the kids in the courtyard with a giant screen and projector and super-loud speakers. It started at 8PM. There were two movies. It was literally in our courtyard so of course there was no way I could keep my kids from going. Yes, they went to bed at midnight two nights before school started. I mean I love our building, our neighbors, our courtyard but why would you plan to deprive children of sleep right before the start of school? Does that sound like a good idea to anyone?
In spite of the late nights, the school year has gotten off to a great start. Each child is in a different school. When we first got to Modiin we heard about a school that started about 6 or 8 years ago and has a tremendous reputation. Basically people told us not to even think about getting our kids into the school because there are wait lists and it's impossible to get in. It's not a private school but maybe more like a magnet or charter school. So naturally who does Nehemiah become friends with right away---a bunch of the kids from this school. They all assumed he could just "get in". You know, because they're 10 years old. One of our projects while my parents were here was trying to get him in since it did seem like such a good fit. And while there are many ways in which I could describe Nehemiah, motivated student would not be one of them. In spite of that, and in spite of all the odds, we did get him in! It was such a relief. Running with this new crowd of kids N had started to feel really comfortable in Israel. One day he announced that he was going to stop calling soccer by that name and call it football. He reasoned that really only Americans called it soccer and he wasn't in America any more. I took this as a real sign of progress and then he went on to tell us that he thinks he has realized his true destiny: to be British and be the goalie for Liverpool!
Lital is in the local public school that is basically on our corner. She slid right in and the teacher said that unlike new immigrants who tend to stick with English speakers only, Lital is friends with native Israelis and immigrants. Most of the school-age kids from our building go to this school so it is a natural fit. I was very happy to hear that. Ariella goes to a Gan (kindergarten) in a building right next to Lital's school. We are in a very sweet spot in the mornings b/c the girls have about a 5 minute walk (don't worry, I take Ariella) and Nehemiah has about a 12 minute walk. Everyone can get out and no need to rush into a car. It is actually pleasant. Last night Ariella asked Michael how to say "Spanish" in Hebrew. She explained that she wants to find out if anyone in her class speaks Spanish but she can't ask them in Spanish because she doesn't speak it, and she can't ask them in English because they wouldn't understand, and she can't ask them in Hebrew, because she doesn't yet know how to say "Spanish"! What she plans to do with this information is beyond me. We are glad that she has a few English speakers in her Gan because she no longer speaks English like a native but instead translates from the Hebrew. For example:
"Will you give to me that apple?" or "Hadar wants me to visit if you let." Between English at home and having a few English speaking friends, hopefully that trend will reverse itself.
Rosh Hashana, the Jewish new year starts tomorrow. I have crammed a lot in, perhaps rambled a bit. Our year is certainly off to a sweet start. Let me sign off with the following blessing, inspired by Ariella:
I wish to you a good and sweet year!
A few highlights from their trip:
While they were here my dad's energy was incredible. We took advantage of every minute. First of all, my parents brought about 20 pounds of candy to Israel. The dogs at the airport were probably going nuts thinking that there was something contraband tucked away b/c who in the world brings candy to Israel? But God bless my parents--they brought 4 suitcases worth of stuff. One of the things they brought was fresh blueberries. It had been over a year since we've had berries, so they were a big hit. I am not sure why we don't have blueberries here. I have heard you can pick them in the Golan but that would be a drive of several hours, so maybe on some future trip.
After the first Shabbat spent with good friends in Elazar we headed up North. We went rafting on the Jordan River. By "we" I mean everyone except for Ariella and me, because in the rafting company employee we found the one person in Israel who was concerned with safety and wouldn't let Ariella go in, because she was under five. We still had fun though, because well frankly, when was the last time you spent a couple of hours without any distraction hanging out with your child outdoors? I learned all about her desire to become a bird and live in the tree tops or a lion and roar at the animals in the jungle.
Our friends in Elazar recommended we go to a placed called "The Orange Grove." What a fabulous tip. I haven't seen it in guide books, but if you are visiting in Israel and have children I would try to get there. It's like winning a golden ticket. But instead of being invited to Willy Wonka's chocolate factory you are invited to his back yard. They literally built a backyard type play area in an orange grove. I mean some people have pretty cool yards. They have zip lines, and a pool and a cool jungle gym (hey Jay and Margie--how are you doing?) but nobody I know has a back yard like this. Pretty much any cool thing you could think of to run and jump and play with in a backyard was in this orange grove and it was a ton of fun.
One day we went to the Jerusalem zoo and then met cousins at the outdoor mall bordering the old city. My dad and one cousin walked to the Kotel (Western wall) and then met us at a restaurant. Some kind of artist fair was going on, and the mall was packed. Musicians were playing and it was just a very festive atmosphere. Luckily, the Italian place we like is sort of hidden away so there was no wait to get in. As we were trying to figure out exactly what the relationship would be between my kids and my mom's cousins' grandkids, their daughter said "We're English speaking relatives in Israel--that's practically like being twins." And it's true. For us anyway, as we don't really have much family here. As we were leaving the restaurant, Lital said she wanted ice cream and since it was only 10PM and we were in Jerusalem with the grandparents, she got her wish. You never have to go too far to find ice cream in Israel (unless it's 10PM and you're at Mamilla mall with your children. That particular detour will cost you at least an hour!)
One day while driving with my mom, I got distracted by Waze (oops) and popped a tire as I bumped up the curb. I pulled the car over about a block later and before we could even get out of the car, a jogger stopped and offered to change the tire. I was so confused as to why he had been out running with a jack but later my mom explained that it was from my trunk. I took a whole semester of driver's ed and frankly I feel like I should get a refund or something because I knew absolutely nothing about changing a tire. In fact, I didn't even put the car in neutral as I was apparently supposed to. The fellow who was helping joked that he should have known Americans wouldn't know to put the car in neutral. Don't be offended, I lived up to every stereotype imaginable that day. It is something I love about Israel and Modiin people are really helpful.
As is the case with most trips, we didn't do everything we wanted but we had a truly great time together. My parents left the night before school started. Now, I've previously told you about our "courtyard of dreams" (another great name from my friend Ilene). So two nights before school started they had a movie night for the kids in the courtyard with a giant screen and projector and super-loud speakers. It started at 8PM. There were two movies. It was literally in our courtyard so of course there was no way I could keep my kids from going. Yes, they went to bed at midnight two nights before school started. I mean I love our building, our neighbors, our courtyard but why would you plan to deprive children of sleep right before the start of school? Does that sound like a good idea to anyone?
In spite of the late nights, the school year has gotten off to a great start. Each child is in a different school. When we first got to Modiin we heard about a school that started about 6 or 8 years ago and has a tremendous reputation. Basically people told us not to even think about getting our kids into the school because there are wait lists and it's impossible to get in. It's not a private school but maybe more like a magnet or charter school. So naturally who does Nehemiah become friends with right away---a bunch of the kids from this school. They all assumed he could just "get in". You know, because they're 10 years old. One of our projects while my parents were here was trying to get him in since it did seem like such a good fit. And while there are many ways in which I could describe Nehemiah, motivated student would not be one of them. In spite of that, and in spite of all the odds, we did get him in! It was such a relief. Running with this new crowd of kids N had started to feel really comfortable in Israel. One day he announced that he was going to stop calling soccer by that name and call it football. He reasoned that really only Americans called it soccer and he wasn't in America any more. I took this as a real sign of progress and then he went on to tell us that he thinks he has realized his true destiny: to be British and be the goalie for Liverpool!
Lital is in the local public school that is basically on our corner. She slid right in and the teacher said that unlike new immigrants who tend to stick with English speakers only, Lital is friends with native Israelis and immigrants. Most of the school-age kids from our building go to this school so it is a natural fit. I was very happy to hear that. Ariella goes to a Gan (kindergarten) in a building right next to Lital's school. We are in a very sweet spot in the mornings b/c the girls have about a 5 minute walk (don't worry, I take Ariella) and Nehemiah has about a 12 minute walk. Everyone can get out and no need to rush into a car. It is actually pleasant. Last night Ariella asked Michael how to say "Spanish" in Hebrew. She explained that she wants to find out if anyone in her class speaks Spanish but she can't ask them in Spanish because she doesn't speak it, and she can't ask them in English because they wouldn't understand, and she can't ask them in Hebrew, because she doesn't yet know how to say "Spanish"! What she plans to do with this information is beyond me. We are glad that she has a few English speakers in her Gan because she no longer speaks English like a native but instead translates from the Hebrew. For example:
"Will you give to me that apple?" or "Hadar wants me to visit if you let." Between English at home and having a few English speaking friends, hopefully that trend will reverse itself.
Rosh Hashana, the Jewish new year starts tomorrow. I have crammed a lot in, perhaps rambled a bit. Our year is certainly off to a sweet start. Let me sign off with the following blessing, inspired by Ariella:
I wish to you a good and sweet year!
Friday, August 2, 2013
Downton Abbey
My wise friend Elisa calls the first year in Israel the "Sabbatical year" for children. What with all the new things being thrust at them every day, it's natural to sort of ease up on the home front expectations. To that end, the kids have not had a lot of responsibility at home this past year and have sort of come to see Michael and me as their personal wait staff. With moving again, I was sort of inclined to extend the Sabbatical season a bit but when they started giving us 3's and 4's on the comment cards I realized that perhaps things had gone a bit too far. So now we are giving them chores and added duties at home. They of course are thrilled with the new management. Recent exchange:
Child: I need water.
Me: OK. You know where the cups are so you can get your own water.
Child: Do I have to do everything around here?
And my personal favorite from a child: (frustrated tone) "Really you guys, I just finished vacuuming." It's almost too much fun. Plus, not that I am in anyway insulting their abilities but they're currently making plans to market their "cleaning crew" to the neighbors and while I grant that people often grumble about the availability of a good cleaner, I don't think they are yet up to the challenge.
After some of their household duties were done we went to a pottery painting place nearby. It's a worthwhile outing because it keeps the kids occupied for a good 10 minutes. Throw in the 10 minutes there and back and you have a solid 30 minute activity. Seriously though, it was fun. A woman stopped to admire the frog N was painting and she told him he might become a famous painter. He replied that it was actually his dream to become the goalie for Liverpool. Wouldn't you know? She was from Liverpool. It was great. As we were leaving he gave her his name so she could watch for him in 10 years. Savta Joanie always loves taking the kids to paint pottery and now that we live so close to one, you can take them next time you're here Joan.
Meanwhile, back at the ranch Lital ripped a sleeve on her dress but assured me that she could fix it because "Bubbie taught me how to sew." Well it looks like she needs a reminder tutorial from Bubbie but I figured that if I can suture in the ED how different can it be? So I fixed the dress but Bubbie, the kids have been asking when you are coming to visit. They want their apple slices, cookies, potato latkes and knishes. OK, I'm the one who wants the knishes but the kids miss their Bubbie so please plan a visit soon! So excited to see my parents, Saba and Savta next week. The kids are excited to show you around and the walking path behind our apartments has around 40+ species of flora and fauna including dad's beloved cacti. We won't have to go far to get the beauty in.
Child: I need water.
Me: OK. You know where the cups are so you can get your own water.
Child: Do I have to do everything around here?
And my personal favorite from a child: (frustrated tone) "Really you guys, I just finished vacuuming." It's almost too much fun. Plus, not that I am in anyway insulting their abilities but they're currently making plans to market their "cleaning crew" to the neighbors and while I grant that people often grumble about the availability of a good cleaner, I don't think they are yet up to the challenge.
After some of their household duties were done we went to a pottery painting place nearby. It's a worthwhile outing because it keeps the kids occupied for a good 10 minutes. Throw in the 10 minutes there and back and you have a solid 30 minute activity. Seriously though, it was fun. A woman stopped to admire the frog N was painting and she told him he might become a famous painter. He replied that it was actually his dream to become the goalie for Liverpool. Wouldn't you know? She was from Liverpool. It was great. As we were leaving he gave her his name so she could watch for him in 10 years. Savta Joanie always loves taking the kids to paint pottery and now that we live so close to one, you can take them next time you're here Joan.
Meanwhile, back at the ranch Lital ripped a sleeve on her dress but assured me that she could fix it because "Bubbie taught me how to sew." Well it looks like she needs a reminder tutorial from Bubbie but I figured that if I can suture in the ED how different can it be? So I fixed the dress but Bubbie, the kids have been asking when you are coming to visit. They want their apple slices, cookies, potato latkes and knishes. OK, I'm the one who wants the knishes but the kids miss their Bubbie so please plan a visit soon! So excited to see my parents, Saba and Savta next week. The kids are excited to show you around and the walking path behind our apartments has around 40+ species of flora and fauna including dad's beloved cacti. We won't have to go far to get the beauty in.
Monday, July 29, 2013
Party like it's 1979
Our first year in Israel has passed. When we landed here July 2012 it was not in our plan to move again but here we are a year later in a new city. Moving this time wasn't nearly as dramatic. Of course the most obvious reason is we didn't have to cross any oceans but putting distance aside, we've been here a year and things have changed. We brought children who speak Hebrew (mind you not like native Israelis--except maybe Ariella) but they can run and play with kids they meet without the barriers they faced last summer. We brought kids who think that bread and chocolate spread is a meal, can give the "wait a second" hand gesture like naturals, drink chocolate milk from a bag and....
Moving into a building with a courtyard has been like a gift from above. Basically, kids from the 4 buildings gather in the evening and play. That breakdown time when you're making dinner and can't handle one more "I'm bored" has been whisked away with the intro of neighborhood play. I can watch them through the kitchen window. Our kids also discovered the apartment intercom. And that's fun. Because of course, why would you walk up a flight of steps if you can just call your mom to let her know every random detail that might enter your head? Buzzzzz. I run to the phone thinking someone has come by only to discover that L or A just wants to let me know they want popsicles, or can I make them popcorn because everyone is eating popcorn, and playing takes just way too much energy for them to come up and place their orders in person (Heaven forfend!)
When I was a kid my mom installed a water fountain on our outdoor spigot to keep us out. Lucky for her--no intercoms at that house.
Meanwhile, we continue our ongoing quest to discover what is wrong with Ariella. You might remember that her pre-K teacher last year was very concerned because A did not speak Hebrew when we arrived. This clearly indicated to her a serious deficiency and she was adamant that we get to the core. Well readers, you will be relieved to hear that after seeing every type of therapist, specialist, and undergoing a series of tests it turns out it was just that she was born in Kansas. Phew. It has been interesting to watch at the different offices because Ariella is like a native Israeli now in many of her mannerisms and her accent, but because she is bilingual there are certain words that she just has not yet come into contact with and it's interesting to watch the development.
It's especially rewarding when we are at the grocery store or pretty much anywhere in public and A starts in with her inquiries. Why did you say it that way ima? (ie the grammatically incorrect way that doesn't make so much sense)
And me. I started at the urgicare. It has been interesting, to say the least. I did my first 4 shifts at the main center in Jerusalem. Most of the patients were extremely understanding that my Hebrew was so poor. One couple became irate and apparently screamed all sorts of insults at me. The poor nurse came in and apologized. "I hope you're not offended." I just chuckled because frankly unless they had given those insults veeeerrrryyyy slooooowly and repeated things a couple of times, I didn't have a snowball's chance in hell of understanding what they said. I have started working now in Modiin and changed my opening line to "I'm new to Israel so my Hebrew is only so-so, let's go slow." It's great because I get welcomed to Israel 20 times a night and many wishes of good luck etc. The irony of course is that occasionally an American tourist comes through and they sigh with relief "thank goodness you speak English." ahem.
Another great thing about our new quad (there are actually 2 quads) is that by sheer dumb luck we seem to have ended up in a great spot for adults. First, we were invited to a Kiddush by one of our neighbors. Never having been to one we weren't entirely sure what to expect. Basically this is a time--after services, but before lunch on Shabbat morning to have a couple of drinks, some cake and socialize without a full lunch. Kind of like meeting someone for coffee instead of dinner. Of course this only works in places like Israel where the "late" minyan finishes at 10:45. Anyway, we have now been to two Kiddushes and they are fantastic. We also got invited to a wine and cheese/karaoke party last week. Like an old fashioned block party. It was really fun though making small talk in Hebrew was a bit challenging for me and I don't think my wittiness improved with the Chardonnay. I'm sure neighbors were impressed with comments like "I am Eliana. I live building 6. We are new. We like here. Is fun." Sounds like these block parties happen every few months so hopefully after a few months at the urgicare I can at least say "How long have you had that rash? Is it itchy? Have you had a high fever?" "How long have you had blood in your stool?"
Another favorite cultural phenomenon is that Nehemiah has fallen in with a group of boys this age who made aliyah at sometime in their life (usually earlier), and as a result, these children are in a time warp. Instead of talking about whoever is the newest-hottest-hippest band in 2013, these kids will have conversations like this real-life exemplar:
Kid 1: "Keith Moon is the greatest drummer ever. The Who rocks. But the Boss is the best. I love Born to Run."
Kid 2: "I'm more into Rush, myself."
And people say that parents have no influence over their children . . .
Thursday, June 27, 2013
View from the hills
I am back from a month in OPKS, and what a month it was. It was really nice to spend time with my family and to see friends and co-workers. Plus I'm a sucker for paved parking lots :)
It is so great to be back home again, except--- home is in a different city, Modi'in! Yes, my gem of a husband not only flew solo with 3 kids for a month but moved to a new city. I know. I'm lucky. I didn't have to be there for the move! (Just kidding, Michael!)
I've already learned a few things since living in Modiin:
1. There is indeed "Shredded Wheat" in Israel. Hooray. But at $8/box it's more of a luxury item than a wholesome breakfast cereal. Make sure to savor every bite.
2. We need gas masks. No one mentioned it in the previous 11 months but during the move a friend mentioned it to Michael. Now we have them but it is illegal to open them unless we are instructed to do so in a real emergency, so we need to watch the video in advance to make sure we know how to use them (which of course I hope we never do!)
3. Deer-shaped bush sculptures are really cool.
We are looking forward to settling in. We've met loads of great people and tons and tons of olim (the reported number is that 50% of our neighborhood is Anglo). We moved into a quad of apartments (think courtyards from Yale, Oxford, Harvard, etc., but without the distinctive architecture) which is dati (religiously observant) and almost exclusively Israeli. We've been told it is called the "kibbutz" because neighbors are so friendly and take care of each other. Since they all met Michael a few weeks before I arrived, I think they were relieved to see that I did actually exist. I think they also assumed that my Hebrew was as good as his and I've held my own (though this morning I think I told a woman that the children's school had closed as opposed to saying that the kids were finishing the school year in our old town---but I'm sure she got the basic idea).
Meanwhile as our first year rapidly approaches the kids are changing by the day. Ariella is a little chatterbox who is trying to teach me Israeli songs and cheers. I start in the urgi-care next week and have contemplated taking her along as my translator but that likely wouldn't go over too well as she is easily distracted.
Lital has lost several teeth, grown several inches and though her spoken Hebrew is still growing daily her understanding of Hebrew is tremendous. We were recently at an event and she told us what they had announced through the loudspeaker--even Michael couldn't make it out.
And N is happier than a pig in sh*t. He has started using the word sh*t and when I asked him about it, he replied "I'm Israeli and sh*t here isn't a bad word--it's like 'darn' in America. I don't think I could ever go back to America now or I'd have to stop using it." So we can question and contemplate what makes a word bad in one place and not somewhere else but yes folks, it took a curse word to trump all the Johnson County luxuries that had previously been calling his name.
In other exciting news, N's baseball team won the junior league championship last week. Driving to the game we passed through a town with bookshelves at the bus stop. One of the kids remarked that "only in Israel would you find sefarim (scholarly religious books) at the bus stop." :) Ironically, the team they played against was Modiin.
It is so great to be back home again, except--- home is in a different city, Modi'in! Yes, my gem of a husband not only flew solo with 3 kids for a month but moved to a new city. I know. I'm lucky. I didn't have to be there for the move! (Just kidding, Michael!)
I've already learned a few things since living in Modiin:
1. There is indeed "Shredded Wheat" in Israel. Hooray. But at $8/box it's more of a luxury item than a wholesome breakfast cereal. Make sure to savor every bite.
2. We need gas masks. No one mentioned it in the previous 11 months but during the move a friend mentioned it to Michael. Now we have them but it is illegal to open them unless we are instructed to do so in a real emergency, so we need to watch the video in advance to make sure we know how to use them (which of course I hope we never do!)
3. Deer-shaped bush sculptures are really cool.
We are looking forward to settling in. We've met loads of great people and tons and tons of olim (the reported number is that 50% of our neighborhood is Anglo). We moved into a quad of apartments (think courtyards from Yale, Oxford, Harvard, etc., but without the distinctive architecture) which is dati (religiously observant) and almost exclusively Israeli. We've been told it is called the "kibbutz" because neighbors are so friendly and take care of each other. Since they all met Michael a few weeks before I arrived, I think they were relieved to see that I did actually exist. I think they also assumed that my Hebrew was as good as his and I've held my own (though this morning I think I told a woman that the children's school had closed as opposed to saying that the kids were finishing the school year in our old town---but I'm sure she got the basic idea).
Meanwhile as our first year rapidly approaches the kids are changing by the day. Ariella is a little chatterbox who is trying to teach me Israeli songs and cheers. I start in the urgi-care next week and have contemplated taking her along as my translator but that likely wouldn't go over too well as she is easily distracted.
Lital has lost several teeth, grown several inches and though her spoken Hebrew is still growing daily her understanding of Hebrew is tremendous. We were recently at an event and she told us what they had announced through the loudspeaker--even Michael couldn't make it out.
And N is happier than a pig in sh*t. He has started using the word sh*t and when I asked him about it, he replied "I'm Israeli and sh*t here isn't a bad word--it's like 'darn' in America. I don't think I could ever go back to America now or I'd have to stop using it." So we can question and contemplate what makes a word bad in one place and not somewhere else but yes folks, it took a curse word to trump all the Johnson County luxuries that had previously been calling his name.
In other exciting news, N's baseball team won the junior league championship last week. Driving to the game we passed through a town with bookshelves at the bus stop. One of the kids remarked that "only in Israel would you find sefarim (scholarly religious books) at the bus stop." :) Ironically, the team they played against was Modiin.
Thursday, June 13, 2013
Made in China
I don't think 11 months is a long enough time to be away that you are considered a foreigner in your own country and yet there I stood on a Friday afternoon, like a stranger from far away. Since I work every night except for Friday nights, I use Friday afternoon as my day to buy things that I want to bring back to Israel. I was somewhat sleep deprived and left my sunglasses on when I went into Target. My regular glasses were in the car and well, I wasn't going to go "all the way back" to the car to get them. I saw a dress hanging on the clearance rack that was very cute but didn't have any particular clearance sticker so I asked a worker to price check it for me.
She looked at the tag, looked at me and in heavily accented English replied "twenty seven ninety nine miss". I can read, so I tried explaining the whole "it was hanging on the rack so I was wondering if it was on sale" thing but she just repeated "twenty seven ninety nine". It's likely she thought I was stoned. And I suppose I was sort of under the influence. The heady intoxication that can only come from buying cheap goods made in China. I don't know why but the cheap goods from China that you buy in Israel are sort of expensive and yet of an inferior quality. If there are any readers out there who can explain it to me, I'd love to know why that is. Either way, I'll be hauling my 40lbs of goodies back with me next week when I head back to Israel.
She looked at the tag, looked at me and in heavily accented English replied "twenty seven ninety nine miss". I can read, so I tried explaining the whole "it was hanging on the rack so I was wondering if it was on sale" thing but she just repeated "twenty seven ninety nine". It's likely she thought I was stoned. And I suppose I was sort of under the influence. The heady intoxication that can only come from buying cheap goods made in China. I don't know why but the cheap goods from China that you buy in Israel are sort of expensive and yet of an inferior quality. If there are any readers out there who can explain it to me, I'd love to know why that is. Either way, I'll be hauling my 40lbs of goodies back with me next week when I head back to Israel.
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